godshattering | abraxas inbox + horizon contact

[ For a second he almost teasingly asks just how many Deer Sylvain's used to being outnumbered by if there's some other situation where that's happened, but that feels too close to peeling away the veneer of not thinking of Fodlan. What's come to pass for him, what might for Sylvain at some point, what will with certainty for Hilda - and for those of their friends who aren't here any longer, and all of it adds up to an ever present knot somewhere in Claude's chest he can never quite ignore.

It feels enough to set the carved deer king where it goes on this board. A tangible reminder of what wouldn't have been possible anywhere but here in a way that's easy enough to muse upon without thinking too much deeper about it - until Sylvain takes it there.

The casualness in it belies something else which makes his blood run cold in his veins for an instant with all the effect of being dunked into ice water when not expecting it. As much as he should keep his eyes on the board, Claude finds his gaze wrenched off it to look at the man across from him. By some miracle his expression remains unchanged - he's pretty sure - even as the reality of that sets in followed by the bitter follow up that there was no way for that to happen in what he'd lived. Was there? If he'd sent a message to Faerghus's last defenders - what good would it have done? Claude thinks faintly of a conversation from long ago where Sylvain wondered if he'd been responsible for dispatching a messenger sent by the Kingdom. ]

It's good to know I was consistent in making the Alliance look far more stable than it was. [ A safe enough statement to start with as he looks pointedly back to the chessboard because that feels - better, even if it's not by much. ] Not sure that would've worked out so well for you considering what happened to Derdriu when Teach wasn't on our side.

[ His gaze flits up to meet Claude’s when he feels those eyes so intent upon him. He’d debated saying anything at all - maybe this was a bad idea. But it’s a topic they’d skirted around before. Carefully avoiding it. Like so many other dangerous topics left unspoken between them. ]

Before Dimitri… the Professor was just as absent anyway.

[ Finding both of them together in the ruins of the Monastery - Sylvain’s pretty sure that had been their first hope of it not ending on the disastrous path they’d all seen it heading.

Since the first move was his, he started with a pawn, shuffling it further up the board to start the play. ]

Felix and I… we’d discussed it. Argued about it. We could hold the north for a time, but not indefinitely. And there was no one else, without them, that we’d have been willing to follow. [ A pause, before he makes a face. ] Well, that I was willing to follow, and drag Felix along with me, likely cursing all the way.

[ This time he resists the urge to look up again in favor of imagining one chess move and then another like it'll clear his head. It does, somewhat, but not enough to dampen any of the far louder thoughts which refuse to leave courtesy of that what if.

It's ridiculous to have felt anything like a flash of hope after that chill of shock faded out since there's no undoing what happened at Gronder. It should make no difference to hear this now because of it, and yet. Grief is the wrong thing to call it, Claude tells himself, to hear there could have been something else. Something that's not the reminder he has more often than not that there will be none of this if they return home: no sitting across from each other playing chess, no complaining about the amount of books scattered across his room, no sense of ease between them, because there will be no Sylvain waiting for him there.

Maybe grief's the right word after all. ]

Well, if there's anything about that I can picture clearly, it's Felix cursing you the whole way and then everyone else after arriving. I don't think we would've had enough swords in the convoy to placate him.

[ Dryly and at least in a normal teasing tone since it's far too easy to slip into that when it comes to talking about Felix, and joking about it drags him back into the present where he can appreciate a chance to tease about the infamous swordsman. Along with also nudging one of his own pawns forward to start the series of moves he has in mind, conveniently without giving Sylvain any hints on strategy. ]

Even now, I'm honestly not sure how either of you managed to hold it for so long, especially against the Empire at that.

[ He hadn’t been intentionally eavesdropping on Claude’s emotions - in fact, he’s been struggling to ignore them more of late. But that wash of sudden and sharp grief catches him like a punch to the gut, making his breath hitch for a moment as his fingers hesitate over his next move.

He stares at the board for a moment, unseeing, because that had been so visceral and unexpected. But as he pauses to wonder why, it’s not hard to piece things together. Even if he’s a little surprised at the strength behind that reaction.

Huh. Well. Apparently Claude would miss him when he was gone after all. What a strange thought. And one he doesn’t want to think too deeply about. Not because he wouldn’t be around to enjoy that fact when it became a reality, but because he doesn’t want to think too much about why that might have elicited such a strong response.

Easier, then, to let Claude divert the conversation to joking and strategy, rather than the grim realities that awaited them back home.

He lets his lips quirk in wry amusement as he slides another pawn forward. ]

Mmm, we used tactics they weren’t familiar with, mostly. The western lords were always pretty arrogant in general, and never studied any strategies outside the ones most common in Fodlan. So we started employing some of the Srengi ambush tactics on them. My father was horrified, but they worked as well on the southern troops sent to subdue us as they had on our invading troops a decade back.

[ He thought Claude might get a kick out of that bit of irony and clever trickery. ]

[ Even with his attention ostensibly on the game before them while he waits for Sylvain to move his next piece, it's difficult to let go of that what if which still feels like it's echoing through his mind with all the repercussions of it. Had this been when he'd arrived, it would've impacted him less. Claude recognizes that without a doubt because it's the weight of everything else following now that they've been here adding to the feeling. There'd been costs in the war which he'd always known, and a handful of them have only come into further focus with perspective.

He shouldn't dwell on them. Maybe he's losing his touch in disconnecting thoughts before they latch on too much to interrupt everything else, though he takes a deep soundless breath and attempts to do that anyway. Sylvain's offered him something to focus on with that talk of strategies used being the further perfect distraction to let it go. ]

That's a good way of using something they'd never see coming.

[ A grin as he taps a finger against his jaw in supposed thought, though whether it's over his next game move or this new revelation Sylvain's offered him is difficult to say. Five years was a long time to hold what little remained of the Kingdom together - in some ways far more than dealing with the Alliance even if both of them balanced on a very fine edge. A hum and then Claude takes a moment to consider what Sylvain might be doing with the lone pawns out there when there's not enough indicators for it yet. ]

Though I don't envy you for it. Spending years arguing with the Alliance lords suddenly seems like a better route when it comes to that, even though that was plenty frustrating in and of itself.

[ Time to gamble on the chess strategy when he reaches for a different piece to slide it into play after going down the list of options. ]

Horrifying your father in the process is just a bonus to that since I think you and Lorenz had that in common when it came to our side of the war.

[ Sylvain’s immediate response is to wrinkle his nose in distaste at that comparison. ]

Hey now. If you’re going to start comparing me to Lorenz, I’m taking the tea back.

[ He adopts a not-so-mildly offended tone at the implied insult there, even as he huffs and leans back in his chair.

There might still be enough of a glimmer of laughter in his gaze, however, to give the ruse away.

Besides, it’s ample enough distraction to give him a moment to study Claude’s most recent move and try to figure out what he’s up to. Not enough clues yet, as usual, so he merely shifts to sliding a third pawn into place to support the first two, setting up a strategy he’s never gotten to try against Claude just yet. It’s a risky one, but also very different from his typical strategies. He’s hoping it’s unexpected enough to give him an advantage here while he keeps the other man guessing at what his aim is.

When trying to outmaneuver Claude? He always needed every advantage he could get. ]

No way, I'm keeping it.

[ As if he has any real fear of Sylvain following through on that threat Claude leans forward to place one hand over his cup of tea and the other over the teapot. That only lasts for so long since it's a good reminder to pour some for them both, finally, what with the chess board having completely distracted him upon coming out here. And, of course, Sylvain counts as several distractions all on his own. ]

I meant it as a compliment! [ If it sounds like he's barely restraining a laugh, it's because he is when he knows that's not going to help the case whatsoever - even if was partially true. ] Nothing wrong with showing your father up in the process. Gods know Lorenz's father desperately needed it more often than not.

[ He's only a little bitter about that after all this time. It'd worked out in the end though some deliberate manipulation, but there's a level of truth to it that it wouldn't have worked out without Lorenz's support in the end. A world away, at this point, and also tied too much to the rest of what Claude doesn't want to think about.

What's better is casting a glance to the board, moving another piece as if on impulse, and then picking up his tea. The scent alone again brings another wide smile to his face though before taking a drink he pauses to look at Sylvain. ]

Kind of feels like we should both take a sip at the same time. I think that's how this works, right?

You compared me to Lorenz!

[ Cue a completely scandalized - and put upon - protest, complete with hand over heart and horrified expression at Claude’s own attempt to excuse away the statement as benign. Ish. ]

In what way could that ever be a compliment?!

[ Somewhere, one Lorenz Hellman Gloucester is being mortally offended right now, but that just makes the faint smirk tugging at the corner of his lips all the more genuine.

Anyway. It’s easier to focus on that half of the statement than any mention of his father. Which he is quite deliberately not touching with a twenty foot pole, he definitely did not have enough wine at dinner to have a conversation like that tonight.

So instead, he just reaches for his tea cup and lifts it, playfully making a little toasting gesture in Claude’s direction. ]

It can be. I’m pretty sure we get to make up whatever rules we want at this point.

[ As someone absolutely delighted by dramatic displays there's no shortage of said delight here now as Sylvain pulls out one long suffering act after another in quick succession. There's no surprise in that being focused on over everything else said, what with it being easier than the rest, and as Sylvain lifts his cup Claude chuckles slightly. ]

I think you'd be surprised. Much like the rest of us Lorenz isn't who he once was. That said, [ with a pause absolutely meant to signal the obvious remark coming, ] it's not like he's strayed too far from being the noble head of House Gloucester.

[ With those final words said in a pristine imitation of Lorenz as well, what with all those years of being able to study the man's mannerisms - and several times of mockery of them along with Hilda. He lets those thoughts fall away as they arrive, focusing instead on leaning forward to signal his own toast. ]

See, that's exactly the kind of response I like to hear. Rewriting all the rules might just be the best birthday present of all.

[ Or something like that as it's another thought he doesn't follow in favor of casting a wink towards Sylvain over the edge of his cup while going to take that first sip finally - and without any teasing behind that much.

It's almost exactly as he remembers it, so much so that homesickness and contentment battle for a few seconds before the latter triumphs, and the smile on his face is nothing but genuine. The amount of work put into creating this tea is something he can only imagine and was done so expertly Claude can't help but marvel over it being done out of nothing but thoughtfulness. ]

If I've already said you've outdone yourself tonight, then I really mean it now after this.

[ Sylvain just laughs, because of course rewriting all the rules would be what appeals to Claude the most there. Grinning, he tips his teacup slightly in Claude’s direction before bringing it to his own lips to taste.

He’s relieved, when it tastes as closely as he remembered. He’d spent weeks tweaking it. Adjusting the measurements of certain ingredients. A little less of this, a little more of this. Some of them had to be mixed from scratch, since he had to replace certain ingredients that didn’t exist here with ones that were close enough to mimic the flavor he remembered. It hadn’t been one of his favorite blends back home, but it had been one of Felix’s, so he was more than familiar with the scent and flavor after years of friendship.

Now, however, he watches over the rim of his teacup as Claude takes his first sip, holding his breath as he waits for the other man’s reaction. The smile that spreads across Claude’s lips as he savors it is enough, at least, to get him breathing again. Even if his smile at the compliment given a moment later is a little sheepish and self-conscious. ]

Did I get it close enough? I was worried the pine would either be too strong… or not strong enough. Nocwich pine works a little differently than Almyran, apparently.

[ He'd meant it, and that he'd meant it is enough to tinge Sylvain's smile with those same feelings he'd seen appear earlier with the compliments. Compliments Claude's no stranger to giving for various reasons, but it feels different to give them to Sylvain even as the other man almost always tries to shake them off or leave them there without acknowledging what was really being said. Or perhaps looks a little too pleased in with that too while trying to hide how much they're enjoyed - though those are usually in a rather different aspect than here and now.

Those reactions are all ones Claude's carefully cataloged over the months, and he watches the one now with a different kind of smile overlaid within the one on his face, something quieter and what would be to himself if it weren't for the fact he's not alone. Something appreciative, something else on top of everything since he'd walked into the loft tonight, something that almost feels like - ]

I wouldn't have minded if it was too much. It'd be close then to the nights I brewed a pot and forgot about it while I got distracted by this map or that one so it steeped for far too long. [ During the war particularly there'd been plenty of times he'd gone to take an absent sip of said tea and found it far more bracing than intended, but Claude figures mentioning studying maps will cover that enough. ] If you're planning on tinkering with it some more, I'm happy to provide any input. And taste test it, though hopefully that part goes without saying and will make the variety of input I'll have worth it.

Why doesn’t that surprise me in the least?

[ He can’t help but laugh at the mental image, well able to picture just that when it came to Claude. How many nights had he found him ensconced deep in the library long after everyone else had gone to bed, back in their Academy days? Of course, he’d still been out and about himself, but that was usually for far different reasons.

But his smile, as he watches Claude sample another swallow, is quietly fond. ]

I’ll probably tinker with it some more, if you think it needs it. I’m still cataloguing the spices and herbs I can get here and what they taste like when prepared different ways. It’s much harder when I have to learn all new ingredients from scratch like this. But I’ll be sure to make you the official taste tester, then. At least of this brew. I doubt you’d like the sweeter ones I’ve been fidgeting with very much.

Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up.

[ Sounding put out about that is purely to match Sylvain's too entertained laughter. Besides, Claude's willing to admit that even with the past behind them there's been plenty of nights here where he's done the same or come close to it. Including falling asleep while reading a book when he hadn't thought he was all that tired, but at least here it comes with getting actual rest instead of some quick amounts to scrape by between planning this movement in the war and the next. ]

A title I'm going to wear with pride, [ he interjects upon the matter of being a taste tester before taking another sip to let Sylvain finish his thoughts. It really is great tea. ] I'd be willing to suffer the sweeter ones in the name of helping find what you're going for. They're not my favorites but I remember the popular ones well enough to help, or at least help pick out the specific overtones I didn't like.

Though, [ speaking of sweeter teas and now his expression brightens slightly, ] if you happen to work on a version of Leicester Cortania that's another one I miss. And there's others in the Horizon who've had it when I've made it there, so I daresay you'd have an even bigger market for that one.

[ Sylvain doesn’t supply that he maybe helped with those nights Claude fell asleep, not realizing he was so tired. Because he might not have been, but he’d never complained about the extra rest the next morning, so Sylvain was still taking it as a win.

He grins at Claude’s continued excitement over the tea, feeling a soft rush of pleasure heat up the back of his neck. The praise is… nice. Not something he’s all that accustomed to, but doubly so when this is something he’d worked uncharacteristically hard at to get perfect. It had been important, and it was nice that it had turned out so well in the end. It wasn’t something he was accustomed to feeling, for one reason or another. ]

I can probably give that one a try. I’ll confess, I’m not as familiar with that one. This one, at least, I could cheat on a little, since it had also been one of Felix’s favorites. I was pretty familiar with it to start with.

Nothing a trip into the Horizon won't fix when it comes to reminding you of what it's like.

[ A shrug of one shoulder, since - if there's any use for being able to conjure whatever they want and have it resemble exactly what it'd be in real life, at home, whatever else: it's absolutely to be able to bring all those teas back in. Useful too for ones he's not tasted in years from before Fodlan, though Claude keeps that to himself. ]

A little spice, a little bitterness - all of it makes for a pretty good tea and Derdriu's merchants usually kept it in stock. [ Pause for a slight grin over the rim of his cup as he takes one more drink and then sets it down onto the sauce to await a few more chess moves first as if there's not an entire teapot there still waiting to be finished. ] Almyran Pine, too, if you knew where to look in the corners of the marketplaces around since I found it while looking for something else.

But, you know, [ and that's absolutely a prelude to mild mischief in a sign Sylvain may well recognize by now, ] I'm not surprised to hear it might've also been popular in Faerghus. It's a good outdoor tea for all your wintertime trips, I'd imagine.

[ Yeah, he’s pretty sure he’d recognize that while blindfolded by now. Still, he snickers as he makes another move, supporting one of the pawns he’d moved forward early on. Setting up this new strategy, as ridiculous as he’s sure it looks to the mastermind on the other side of the board.

Maybe he’s just trying to throw him off by trying to figure out what the hell he’s up to. It’s about time he got to turn that particular table around on the man. ]

How often do you think we stop long enough to make tea when we’re on one of our ‘wintertime trips’, as you call it? [ Amusement gleams in amber eyes as he leans back and takes another sip of his tea, letting Claude make his move. ] Trust me when I say if you’re traveling through Gautier territory in the middle of winter, you’re not stopping for anything short of an emergency.

Look, I mean any trip. You're the ones spending any sort of time out in the weather at all.

[ As if that really refuted any of what Sylvain said, though Claude waves a hand in supposed confirmation. It's done at the same time he leans forward to move another piece to idly threaten one of Sylvain's from a couple squares away yet, and not without an entirely different plan in mind for it.

Right after he's done slandering Faerghus some more on the topic of winter, anyway. ]

I think you and I have very different definitions of wintertime, what with one of us enjoying the snow and the other not unless it's from inside and behind some windows, doors, and walls. Plus with a fireplace. [ He's trying to look serious while reclining back in his seat once more and somewhat failing. ] And I bet if it somehow snowed here in Cadens, like the kind of snow that absolutely buries the streets and everything else, you'd be out there in it with no coat or anything.

[ He stares at Claude’s move with a narrowed gaze. What are you up to, sir? ]

I’m pretty sure you still don’t know what an actual winter is meant to be like. Although I suppose some of the northernmost territories of the Alliance might get close. I’m also not sure Cadens has ever seen that kind of snow, but you’re right, I would absolutely be out playing in it if it did.

And don’t worry. If I’m not wearing my coat, that means there’s two we can bundle you up in so you don’t freeze off your delicate parts.

[ He’s smirking as he slides his knight out onto the board. ]

[ That stare's too strong to be anything but trying to figure out what he's doing, and Claude narrowly resists the urge to smirk. Better to keep the event smile on his face even as Sylvain lectures him on winter and he's watching the next chess move while half-running through the possibilities of what to do next in his mind. ]

Derdriu's not much for snow since the sea keeps it rather warm. There's always Edmund to visit for that, though really you'd be better off in Goneril.

[ A better use for Fodlan's Throat than the Locket, anyway, when it comes to reasons to be there. But that's not part of the conversation, and so Claude shrugs. ]

I think I'll need a lot more than your coat and mine to survive it. But speaking of freezing, maybe you should be more worried about that.

[ Claude slides another piece into play and this time to menace a different one of Sylvain's before holding a hand out with his palm to the sky to gesture to the board. ]

If I capture that one, I think you should lose a piece of clothing. It is my birthday, after all.

[ Don't ask him to explain the logic. There is none aside from finding a new way to undress Sylvain, and to create another little friendly competition between them where everyone wins. ]

[ The unexpected challenge from Claude has both of Sylvain’s eyebrows arching upwards in surprise before he starts laughing. ]

So your birthday wish is to play strip chess, huh? [ That is such a sneaky Claude idea he can’t even say he’s all that surprised by it. ] So for every lost piece one of us loses an article of clothing, huh? You’re just trying to distract me from beating you, aren’t you?

[ Eyeing the board, he’s pretty sure that piece is a lost cause, but he can angle another in behind it. Fair’s fair, after all. If he’s losing some of his clothes, so should Claude. ]

[ That laughter gets a wide grin from him since Claude would be lying to himself if that wasn't half of his point - the other half being that this is a valid challenge after all and not just from birthday wishes alone. ]

No, I think you should genuinely fear losing all of your clothes at a much faster rate than I will. [ He might be playing up the smugness there purely for effect, especially considering he knows Sylvain isn't likely to go easy on him. Just as much as the reverse is also true considering they're both a little too competitive for that.

Which is why after Sylvain brings his backup piece in, Claude immediately sweeps one of his other pieces lying in wait over to claim it and hold it up between two fingers to waggle it triumphantly. ]

Look, I'll even be nice and say you can pick the first thing to lose this time around.

[ Sylvain just arches an eyebrow, grin still playing about his lips as he eyes him a moment before scooching his chair back enough to prop one ankle up on his knee. One boot gets removed and set very deliberately on the floor beside their table. ]

I might lose them faster, but you're gonna lose just as many. So you should probably be relieved it's still so warm out here, otherwise you'd get pretty uncomfortable pretty quick.

[ Clearly the temperature isn't much of a factor for him. But considering Claude jumped on taking out his backup, he moves out another piece he hadn't even touched yet - specifically for this purpose - and takes the conquering piece Claude had just moved, claiming it as his own. He wiggles it in Claude's direction with a smirk. ]

Your turn.

[ He leans back in his chair again with that smirk lingering, arms crossing over his chest as he watches Claude. Laughter glinting in amber eyes. ]

You know, we better hope that Altair doesn't decide this is a good night to crash onto our roof. He might get a show.

[ A wave of his hand follows Sylvain's proclamation about losing just as many since he's as unconcerned about that as he's acting. That's half the fun - and he'll certainly take that challenge to run with it even more as Sylvain removes a boot, to which he offers a snort of laughter, and then it's his own turn to lose something he's wearing.

Two can play this game, quite literally. Claude doesn't hesitate to lean back in his seat while making a show of stretching one leg out over the other in very convenient semi-slow motion. The action's capped by resting one heel on top of his other foot to toe off his shoe. The shoe's left to its own devices in rolling to wherever it goes after it hits the floor as he leans forward again. ]

Get ready for the show then considering you'll be putting on most of it. [ With an easy grin as he moves another piece into place that'll help him with 3-5 strategies depending on what Sylvain does next, and because he has a feeling the other man will pick up on that due to being far better at chess than he stays and to keep up the teasing. ] Your wanting to dress extra lightly in the warm weather might be working against you, really.

[ Sylvain just watches Claude's shoe roll a short distance away before flopping on its side, his expression one of dry exasperation. Claude did that on purpose, he's sure, but he doesn't comment on it because he's already giving Claude more than he needs to lord it over him right now.

Still, he grins at the taunt, shifting another piece to both challenge and taunt Claude's move in turn, setting up several moves for himself in turn, depending on what Claude does. He usually plays far more offensively than this, comfortable taking the initiative, but Claude typically outmaneuvers him easily. So he's trying a different strategy. Not that he thinks he can pull of Claude's sneakiness anywhere near as good, but it'll be fun to throw him off while Sylvain tries it out. ]

That just means I gotta make sure to sweep off as many of your pieces as possible, then. There should be enough to give me a good show.

[ Although going with that plan probably doesn't match up well with his decision to not play offensively for once. Eh, whatever. ]

Looking forward to me losing my other shoe that much, huh?

[ Claude's resting all too casually in his chair now in between the (chess) moves being made. Sylvain's latest one doesn't seem to fit in his plans at first glance, though while studying the board mostly from the corner of his eye he flashes the other man a grin. Can't give away all that deep thinking so immediately even as a part of his mind is - unsurprisingly - still whirling through strategies. ]

Hope you don't mind working for both the shoe and the rest of the show while you're at it.

[ Stating the obviously there, Claude thinks as he decides upon his next move. One reach forward has him sliding yet another piece into play almost idly and like there's no stakes to this at all. Which there isn't aside from that potentially missing clothing, but that's all the better to tease. And at the last second, he sweeps over one of Sylvain's pawns rather than letting it sit, and places it next to the other one. ]

And with that I think I've earned your other boot now, so off it goes.

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