godshattering | abraxas inbox + horizon contact

All I'm hearing is a whole lot of reasons you should absolutely be on the pine needles' side. How are you going to say you appreciate forests without even appreciating the tea made from them?

[ Or some such logic; Claude holds his hands out before him with palms turned towards the ceiling like he's convincing a much larger crowd than one amused Faerghan before him. Sylvain's rescued from wherever he was going to go with that pose - like perhaps working up to some speech for entertainment's sake - by the kettle whistling which he promptly retrieves. ]

Don't worry, you can make up for it in mere minutes now that the water's ready for something far better than cabbage. We'll leave that to be something that haunts us both until it appears in the markets soon enough, and then you can add it to your cooking rotation to see what happens.

I can appreciate a lot of things without the need to drink them, you know.

[ The retort is playful and flippant, laughter barely hidden in his tone as he gets up to retrieve the tea blend now that the water is ready.

Trying not to look nervous now that Claude actually is going to try the stuff, he carries it over to where the other man stands, holding it out to hgim with a cheeky grin and a wink. ]

I’ll make sure to surprise you with something creative when you least expect it.

Not without properly appreciating them.

[ Sylvain has a point, but that won't stop Claude from getting in a supposed last word in there even if he's now grinning to match that laughter he hears within the other's response. That's half the fun - or possibly more than half - in keeping this going.

Still, the smile on his face as he reaches to take the tea from Sylvain is a genuine one though whether it's from the conversation, the grin, the wink, or some combination of all of it will have to remain a mystery when he opens it to set some in to steep. ]

Well, now I'm just counting on that surprise. Especially since you won't let me surprise you by cooking anything for you, though I maintain you might like some of it.

Are you saying I don’t properly appreciate you?

[ He arches an eyebrow as he delivers that comeback, and then pauses as if to consider that in more detail. ]

No. Nevermind. That’s not an accurate comparison. I have definitely…

[ Yeah, he’s gonna lean in and steal a kiss from Claude’s lips instead of finishing that very leading sentence.

Pulling back, he’s still giving him an impish grin with eyes full of mischief, even as he relinquishes the tea. ]

I’m sure you cooking anything would be a surprise, including whether I’d like it or not. Or if it’s edible. Or won’t kill me within twenty-four hours. Or-

[ Claude, you might want to stop him before he really gets on a roll disparaging your kitchen skills. ]

[ It's a good thing Sylvain leans in then because he's already formulating a quick response to that, because of course he is, and of course it'll be to immediately challenge what's said like there's any truth to any lack of appreciation anywhere here. Instead he hums a soft noise into that kiss as if he's got a placeholder for whatever thought was about to be said instead of letting it go in favor of this, content to do just that.

Even as Sylvain pulls back and keeps going with a grin on his face Claude can admit (to himself) is more than a little dazzling for how it lights up his features, even if it's fueled by teasing. It doesn't make it less bright nor does it keep that feeling he's still so reluctant to define with a name despite knowing exactly what the shape of it is and what it means, but Claude buries it yet again tonight by reaching up to tug the other down for another kiss that's firmer this time. ]

Alright, I get the point. We can't all be incredible chefs like you, you know. [ Murmured with a grin against Sylvain's lips, though he follows that up with a nip to the other man's bottom lip. ] Though I do know how to make a few things before you slander me to no end. I'll show you in the Horizon if you're that afraid of being poisoned.

[ Sylvain just grins into that kiss. Shifting now that his hands are free, he props them on the counter to either side of Claude’s hips, penning him in as he kisses him again. Taking his time and not in any rush to move right now.

The nip to his lip gets a soft chuckle from him as his nose brushes against Claude’s before he kisses his way back the man’s jaw instead. ]

Hmm. I suppose that’s safe enough. Although if you poison me in the Horizon, am I still poisoned in real life? I guess not. Fine, you can host the next dining hall dinner then.

[ The hands coming to rest on either side of him are nice, but what's even far nicer still is that it brings Sylvain closer to keep him there. At first he lets his hands rest on the other man's waist with fingers absently trailing over the fabric beneath his fingers as he closes his eyes in quiet contentment to soak up the attention from familiar lips moving along his jaw.

With it comes the feeling that it's still not close enough yet, something which still comes with a faint tinge of surprise carried by all those years of keeping nearly everyone at arm's length until he no longer had. But in this moment it's only paired with the minor marvel of Sylvain becoming one of those people in (relatively) short time as he moves to loop his arms around the other man's shoulders as he opens his eyes, and that's also swept away when presented with something else to focus on. ]

Are you volunteering to be my first test subject to find out if that's true? That could easily be arranged. [ A hum goes with that like he's thinking about this anywhere past the surface level of another way to tease. ] Just think of it as another element of surprise to everything to make it all the more exciting.

[ Sylvain just groans and lets his head drop to rest against Claude’s shoulder. ]

You’re the worst at surprises.

[ Despite the complaint, his voice is still full of fondness. Although he’s not actually denying playing guinea pig either way.

Foolish as it might be, he actually does trust Claude. ]

[ A quiet chuckle leaves him at that, one which doesn't really feel loud enough to perfectly capture how entertaining that complaint is. It's probably better than laughing right in Sylvain's ear, at any rate, as he shifts to nudge the side of the other's face with his nose. ]

I think I'm rather good at them, really, especially since if I did have plans to poison you that counts as a surprise.

[ Technically counts as a surprise, which is close enough in Claude's mind. Especially as he moves ever so slightly again to place a hand on the back of Sylvain's neck while leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek, affection not yet spent enough for the moment. ]

I'll surrender my title of being good at surprises to you for now since I think you've more than earned it with all of this.

[ That has him pulling back far enough to see Claude’s face again, a hint of a sheepish smile lingering about the corner of his lips as amber eyes search the other man’s face. ]

You liked your birthday surprise, then?

[ It’s an unusual tone to his voice. Sylvain’s not normally one that lets any insecurities or vulnerabilities show so openly, but they lurk there, behind the hopeful tone in his voice as he searches Claude’s expression. ]

[ When Sylvain moves Claude doesn't keep him where he was in that flop of mock defeat, instead studying his face for a second as the other stands back up. Whatever flippant response was on the tip of his tongue fades away as he does so. Whether it's the expression or what was said with nothing else behind it - nothing to make it seem like it was quite like the playful fishing for compliments each of them do now and then to lighten a mood or make the other laugh.

This is something else, he thinks, and as if he simply can't decide where to place his hands for enough contact when now he moves it to cradle one side of Sylvain's face with a genuine smile as that feeling swoops in to tug at the edges of it again. ]

But there was more than just one surprise, wasn't there? Between everything you put into dinner, all the gifts... I'd hate for you to sell yourself short, Sylvain. I loved all of it.

[ Something in him relaxes again at that, and at the sight of that smile from Claude. He’s gotten pretty good at reading each one. What they mean, or as close to it as he can get.

That one? It’s one of his favorites.

He lets his head fall forward to rest against Claude’s their noses brushing together as he rests there. ]

Well, it was all part of one big surprise, technically. I’m glad you liked it, though. And that dinner wasn’t actually terrible. [ He adds this last part with a laugh, as if joking about it now might cancel out the momentary vulnerability in the previous question. ]

[ The smile doesn't fade as Sylvain tips his head forward; instead, it turns into something what might almost be considered a private one - aside from the part where it's still entirely visible to the man in front of him - and one filled with more of that feeling. Rather than sweep it away as anything else he lets it stay while tracing his thumb over the other's cheek. ]

What'd I say about not selling yourself short? You get credit for all of it.

[ Whatever protest is in that, faint as it is, is also softened by affection. He's come to expect Sylvain will find one of the many ways he seems to have to skirt around a compliment where now was no exception. That won't stop him from paying the compliments all the same or repeating them as much as it takes for them to sink in with now being no exception.

Including one that's still forthcoming since with one small lean upwards for another kiss: there's still the tea waiting for them. ]

I think this should be about ready now, [ is what Claude offers by way of a segue afterwards since that pine aroma's much stronger than before thanks to the steeping being complete as he drops both hands to Sylvain's shoulders. ] What do you say we head back and get to the chess you also promised me?

[ Sylvain's smile holds a note of softness that's been appearing more and more lately. Not that he's aware of that, exactly, but he doesn't do anything to diminish it in the moment either.

Dropping one last kiss to Claude's lips, he straightens with an incline of his head. ]

I'll put the leftovers away while you get the tea sorted. Where do you want to play? Inside or out?

[ An intriguing question, and that's one Claude considers while reaching for a tray to carry all of their tea supplies on. ]

Outside, I think. The evening's cool enough that I think even you won't melt with hot tea to go with that.

[ He's not going to miss a chance to lightly tease Sylvain all because he can while picking up the tray to head out to the terrace. One fragile thing to move at a time as the cups rattle thanks to the motion and he keeps a careful eye on them. Once they're set down, it's back for the chess set next which gets carried with no less reverence.

Lovely as the dim lighting inside had been, the bright moonlight above helps illuminate everything a bit more. By the time Sylvain makes it outside, he'll find Claude distracted with the board only partially set up since he's once again admiring everything about each piece being set out until he looks up with a smile. ]

Turns out being out here was all the better for getting to see all the work on these, too. You really went all out.

[ The remaining dinner is quickly packed up and stored away in the icebox before Sylvain heads out onto the terrace to join Claude, unsurprised to find him still in the midst of setting up the board.

Still, he grins with quiet pleasure at Claude's appreciation of his gift. ]

I'm glad you like it. I was originally gonna get Jace to help me, but... I ended up finding an artisan in Libertas I could commission to carve what I needed. I wasn't sure if it would be too much of a cliché or not, but I figured at least it would be a pretty collection for you.

Whatever that artisan charged you wasn't enough for how good these are.

[ Teasingly, even if some part of him is serious about that and means it as another compliment to the selection of the absolutely beautiful board and pieces that it is. The knight in his hand is set down where it goes, and then it's just a matter of straightening everything up a bit on the squares to make sure they can all be seen and properly appreciated. ]

The other board I have is one I bought the instant I had enough coin to get it not long after arriving. It's served its purpose well but I think this will be my favorite by far. Now, [ picking up one piece in each palm and shuffling them out of sight as best he can before concealing them in closed hands he holds out to Sylvain with a grin, ] Lions or Deer?

[ Sylvain just arches an eyebrow in amusement as he sinks down in the chair across from Claude. ]

Was that a serious question?

[ You should already know the answer to that without having to ask. ]

[ Claude merely arches an eyebrow right back as if unimpressed. He isn't, but it's required for further teasing. Of course. ]

Look, I know what you really want since now's finally your chance to join the Deer after all, but you'll have to choose them first to make that happen. [ With a helpful wiggle of his fists still concealing the pieces in question waiting for Sylvain's selection for the choice in question that's pending since he'll absolutely be stubborn enough to sit here until one is made. ] Better question: left or right?

Pretty sure your last attempt to lure me into transferring was far more elaborate than that. Although I seem to recall telling you then that you’d have had better luck if you’d sent the girls to invite me.

[ It had been a flippant dismissal, at the time. An evasion, and one he hadn’t put much thought into. But that had been early in their time in the Academy, and he hadn’t known Claude very well yet. Not past some idle curiosity over the man who seemed to wear as many masks as he did.

Which just made him dangerous to get too close to. Sylvain could safely hide among the Lions. They’d all known him long enough that none of them looked at him too closely anymore. Just accepted the truth of what he showed everyone, back then. He’d doubted, even then, that Claude would ever be so willingly obtuse.

Still, he reaches his hand out to tap at the knuckles of Claude’s left hand, joking as he does so. ] Choosing right never ends well for me.

All I'm hearing is a challenge to make sure it's even more elaborate this time. No need to confirm that, by the way. I could probably make it happen.

[ He remembers.

There would've been strategy in luring away one of those four close friends from Faerghus, and in the ever turning calculations in his mind back then he'd been deliberate about who he'd selected. Not that he hadn't also tried with Felix (and was met with a particularly Felix brand of disdain) and Ingrid (who'd lectured him until he escaped), though present day Claude feels a bit of uncertainty in whether it's comforting he's apparently tried this in all times - at least with Sylvain - or if it's something else.

Something else nearly wins since with it comes a minor dull ache over what could've been if Sylvain had accepted, but he pushes that aside when it has no place now and can be saved for a later rumination. Less important, clearly, than turning over his left hand and unfurling his fingers to reveal the lion nestled inside. ]

Looks like I still have convincing to do for you to join now even if you're technically outnumbered by Deer as it is. Though I think this means you get to move first in this game, so there's that.

I happen to like being outnumbered by Deer. Or at least the two I’m normally outnumbered by these days.

[ He reaches out to pluck the lion from Claude’s palm, drawing it close to roll it between his fingers consideringly for a moment, taking in the careful craftsmanship that had gone into it. The artist really had outdone himself. ]

You know. [ Stated oh-so-casually as he carefully sets the king in its rightful position on the board. ] If Dimitri hadn’t turned up for our reunion at Garreg Mach and left us all thinking he was dead… we might have been the ones approaching you.

[ He doesn’t look up to meet Claude’s gaze as he drops that nugget of information. It might not have been true in Claude’s world - he has no idea how the differences in their pasts might have altered things. But he knows the position he and Felix had found themselves in at that point of the war. How few options they had left. That had been one of them, and the cause of some pretty heated arguments. Not that that was unusual, when it came to him and Felix. Or Felix and anyone, really. ]

[ For a second he almost teasingly asks just how many Deer Sylvain's used to being outnumbered by if there's some other situation where that's happened, but that feels too close to peeling away the veneer of not thinking of Fodlan. What's come to pass for him, what might for Sylvain at some point, what will with certainty for Hilda - and for those of their friends who aren't here any longer, and all of it adds up to an ever present knot somewhere in Claude's chest he can never quite ignore.

It feels enough to set the carved deer king where it goes on this board. A tangible reminder of what wouldn't have been possible anywhere but here in a way that's easy enough to muse upon without thinking too much deeper about it - until Sylvain takes it there.

The casualness in it belies something else which makes his blood run cold in his veins for an instant with all the effect of being dunked into ice water when not expecting it. As much as he should keep his eyes on the board, Claude finds his gaze wrenched off it to look at the man across from him. By some miracle his expression remains unchanged - he's pretty sure - even as the reality of that sets in followed by the bitter follow up that there was no way for that to happen in what he'd lived. Was there? If he'd sent a message to Faerghus's last defenders - what good would it have done? Claude thinks faintly of a conversation from long ago where Sylvain wondered if he'd been responsible for dispatching a messenger sent by the Kingdom. ]

It's good to know I was consistent in making the Alliance look far more stable than it was. [ A safe enough statement to start with as he looks pointedly back to the chessboard because that feels - better, even if it's not by much. ] Not sure that would've worked out so well for you considering what happened to Derdriu when Teach wasn't on our side.

[ His gaze flits up to meet Claude’s when he feels those eyes so intent upon him. He’d debated saying anything at all - maybe this was a bad idea. But it’s a topic they’d skirted around before. Carefully avoiding it. Like so many other dangerous topics left unspoken between them. ]

Before Dimitri… the Professor was just as absent anyway.

[ Finding both of them together in the ruins of the Monastery - Sylvain’s pretty sure that had been their first hope of it not ending on the disastrous path they’d all seen it heading.

Since the first move was his, he started with a pawn, shuffling it further up the board to start the play. ]

Felix and I… we’d discussed it. Argued about it. We could hold the north for a time, but not indefinitely. And there was no one else, without them, that we’d have been willing to follow. [ A pause, before he makes a face. ] Well, that I was willing to follow, and drag Felix along with me, likely cursing all the way.

[ This time he resists the urge to look up again in favor of imagining one chess move and then another like it'll clear his head. It does, somewhat, but not enough to dampen any of the far louder thoughts which refuse to leave courtesy of that what if.

It's ridiculous to have felt anything like a flash of hope after that chill of shock faded out since there's no undoing what happened at Gronder. It should make no difference to hear this now because of it, and yet. Grief is the wrong thing to call it, Claude tells himself, to hear there could have been something else. Something that's not the reminder he has more often than not that there will be none of this if they return home: no sitting across from each other playing chess, no complaining about the amount of books scattered across his room, no sense of ease between them, because there will be no Sylvain waiting for him there.

Maybe grief's the right word after all. ]

Well, if there's anything about that I can picture clearly, it's Felix cursing you the whole way and then everyone else after arriving. I don't think we would've had enough swords in the convoy to placate him.

[ Dryly and at least in a normal teasing tone since it's far too easy to slip into that when it comes to talking about Felix, and joking about it drags him back into the present where he can appreciate a chance to tease about the infamous swordsman. Along with also nudging one of his own pawns forward to start the series of moves he has in mind, conveniently without giving Sylvain any hints on strategy. ]

Even now, I'm honestly not sure how either of you managed to hold it for so long, especially against the Empire at that.

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